VICHEKESHO VILIVYOTUFIKIA WIKI HII




Jana nilienda kuazima chaji kwa jirani ..sikumkuta ..nilimkuta mwanae
Nikamtumia meseji ili atoe ruhusa nichukue
Akanijibu *21002*
Nikawa mkali nikamuambia kuchajia mara moja tu ndio HELA yote hio si bora nikanunue Chaja yangu mpya.
Akaniambia nimesema TUMIA TU

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚mtatuua na lugha zenu😜
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: Leo Asubuhi kuna gari imepita nyumbani

Ikabidi nianze kuikimbilia ili nione ni nani anayeendesha
Nilipoifikia nikakuta kumbe anayeendesha ni DEREVA :-πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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*Nilikuwa naangalia makomando na mke wangu, mara nikasikia anasema wale ndo wanaume*.😳

*Nimemziba Kofi moja la nguvu naona anatoka na begi....I hope anaenda kwa wanaume*😜😜
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People smoke and drink just once or
twice and get addicted to it. But been studying books and papers since Nursery school but ain't
addicted to studying.
What kind of witchcraft is this?πŸ˜ŒπŸ˜‚ πŸ‘‡πŸΎ
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*Wapendwa Dada zangu, sio kila mwanaume anayevaa suti ni tajiri.., wengine ni Wanakwaya!.*
πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ™ŒπŸΎπŸ™ŒπŸΎπŸ™ŒπŸΎ
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NATAFUTA MSICHANA ANAYEJUA KUCHUNA VIZURI MAANA NATAKA KUFUNGUA BUTCHER.
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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Jana nilienda kuazima chaji kwa jirani ..sikumkuta ..nilimkuta mwanae
Nikamtumia meseji ili atoe ruhusa nichukue
Akanijibu *21002*
Nikawa mkali nikamuambia kuchajia mara moja tu ndio HELA yote hio si bora nikanunue Chaja yangu mpya.
Akaniambia nimesema TUMIA TU

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚mtatuua na lugha zenu😜
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Leo Asubuhi kuna gari imepita nyumbani

Ikabidi nianze kuikimbilia ili nione ni nani anayeendesha
Nilipoifikia nikakuta kumbe anayeendesha ni DEREVA :-πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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*Tangu ninunue blender maisha ni simple,asubui nikitaka uji naweka maji moto nadumbukiza ugali wa jana*
☹☹☹☹ lyf limekuwa simple  tu😜 mbona
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*#Kuanzia Jumanne ijayo, ukiona mtumishi wa umma haendi kazini, anacheza cheza na watoto hapo nyumbani, usiulize maswali mengi!😜😜😜#*
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*Jana mida ya saa  nne usiku tuliskia jirani analalamika _nyoka_ jamani naomba msaada, majirani tukafurika vijana 7 kila mtu na fimbo mkononi, tukaingia barazani nakuzunguuka hilo linyoka*

*punde UMEME UKAKATIKA* 😳😳😳😳

*_ndani ilikua patashika  mwenzako akikugusa UNAMGONGA FIMBO kuzani ni nyoka_*πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

_Saa hizi nipo na maumivu kitandani hata sijui nyoka yupo au kauwawa_🚢🚢🚢

Akili zangu bhna..
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*Swali naombeni Jibu Guys*
*_Badilisha sentensi hii kwa kiengereza*

*_"Baba mimi ni mtoto wako wangapi? "_*

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
*_Ngoja nicheke kwanza mana Mimi nmejikuta ntaka ntaje sentensi kumi mara moja afu zote cdhaki kama ziko sahihi it's your turn now*
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*WALIMU KUPANDA DARAJA JULAI*

Serikal imesema kuanzia mwez wa saba walimu wataanza kutembela daraja jipya la kigamboni kama njia mojawapo ya kukuza utalii wa ndani

***ulidhani madaraja ya mshahara ......utasubiri saaaana😁😁
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*kama ww ni mwanamke na unawanaume zaidi ya watatu na wote wananyonya maziwa yako, jua ww n COW BELL OUR MILK*πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜€πŸ˜€
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*Hivi nan alianzisha huu mchezo wa kunywa chai na chapati mbili*??!
*Maana nimeingia mgahawani nimeagiza chai na chapati nne watu wote wakanitazama mimi*
🌚🌚🌚


*Tusifanyiane hivyo bhana kila mtu na tumbo lake πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚*
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*Girl:* Baby ,Can you speak Italian, German or French??
Because you Like watching their games so attentively.
*Boy:* Yeah I understand Everything...
*Girl:*Mmmmh,can you speak a little so that I can hear??
*Boy*: Neymar Totti Messi Ancelotti Del Piero Gonzalo Dybala
Arbeloa Maldini Di Natale Konte Atletico...
*Girl:* Waoooow....what does it Mean???
*Boy*: In all days of my life,You will Remain being in ma
heart.
*Girl:* Babe....Thank you ...I love you so Much...
*Boy*: Ngolo Kante...
*Girl:* Mmhh...And what does it mean???
*Boy*:Means I love you too..
πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚
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*KWA JINSI NNAVYOPENDA SIFA NADHANI SIKU NIKINUNUA GARI NTAKUWA NALIPAKI WHATSSUP*

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Unapokua unalipa Loan Board, na unakaribia kumaliza ghafla unaona jina lako kwenye vyeti feki kwamba kesho hutakiwi kwenda kwa jobπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Hapo ndio utajua kwanini Treni haina INDICATOR😊😝
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​Mke wako anarudi nyumbani kasuka nywele za 30,000 na hujampa hata mia,we unakalia kusema waooo waoooo kama king'ora cha ambulance.​
​Shauri yako we endelea kusema waoooo waooo na atakuwa wao kweli​πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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*nimeangalia tamthilia ya kikorea inayohusu mapenzi kwa miezi 3 hakuna hata kipande kimoja demu alichoomba hela, cha kushangaza hizi tamthilia dada zetu wanazipenda sana, wanajifunza maudhui yake kweli?*

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚mkinuna poa tu ndo nishasema.
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*HAMNA KITU KINACHOUMA KAMA MPATE AJALI ALAFU UKUTE WEWE TU NDIO UMEKUFA INAKERA SANAA* Unaweza kujinyonga kwa hasira
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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Walimu wanakazi kweli!!!"IN CIVICS CLASS'....
Mwalimu: What is family?? Mwanafunzi: Family is medicated soap.
Mwalimu: Safi sana, Kitaelewaka tuu siku ya Necta nguruwe weweee!!!!!πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…
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Mlevi: Halooo!! Hapo ni kituo cha polisi????
Polisi: Ndiyo, tukusaidie nini?
Mlevi: Kuna wizi umetokea. Nilipaki gari langu baa,nimetoka nakuta usukani, dashbod na kiti cha dereva havipo!
Polisi: Ok…!!!Upo maeneo gani tuje sasa hivi?
Mlevi: Oooooh sorry msije tena, kumbe niliingia mlango wa nyuma
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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Hivi ushawahi penda msichana hadi mkiwa church unamlipia sadaka...unaweka kwa kikapu alafu unamwambia mchungaji kwa ishara ya vidole kuwa sadaka uliyotoa ni."Ya wawili? "..πŸ˜›πŸ˜›πŸ˜›ikifikia hatua hii basi ujue kazi ya moyo ni kusukuma CHAPATI
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*Lakini saa zingine maisha yanakubana mpaka unaanza kujiuliza au ni zile meseji unazoambiwa utume kwa watu 10 na kuzipuuza*πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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Ati wanasemanga ukimcheka mtu utakuwa kama
yeye.... Bill Gates hahahaa,πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ Bill gates hahahahahahahah
ahaπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ ....
Bill Gates
woiiii Bill GatesπŸ™†πŸΎ‍♂πŸ™†πŸΎ‍♂πŸ™†πŸΎ‍♂πŸ™†πŸΎ‍♂πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
i hope nitakuwa kama billgates
sasa
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Daktari alimtembelea mgonjwa.
*Daktari*: Mbona kalala atakua amekufa
*Jamaa*: sijafa daktari
*Mke Wa jamaa*: we acha kubishana na watalaamu wewe πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

wanawake nyie!!
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*Hivi,ulishawahi kumpenda mtu lakini yeye hapendi kuonekana mkiwa pamoja,yaani anakukwepa kwepa tu..*

*HUO NDIO UHUSIANO WANGU NA PESA ULIVYO SASA*
😁😁😁😁
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Mahindi gharama.....sukari gharama..... Condom bure.....

hivi serikali inafikiri sisi nguvu tunazitoa wap sasa Kwa mfano??

πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€
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*Mwalimu aliwauliza wanafunzi*
*"1+1 ni ngapi"?*
*Mwanafunzi mmoja akajibu*
*"ni 4"*
*Mlevi aliyekuwa anapita nje akastuka...*
*"Tutakufa mwaka huu kila kitu kimepanda!*
*Nauli,Sukari, Bia, Chakula*
*....... mpaka 1+1 iliyokuwa 2 nayo imekuwa 4!*πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ”©πŸ”©πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€
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*Baba yako alikuwa anakwambia yeye alikuwa wa kwanza tu darasani juzi umemuona kwenye list ya vyeti feki..*
*Maisha bhna...* πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ€£
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